In my search for a new position hoping I will find an identical twin to the last one I have come across a lot of interesting positions and people. In some ways it is a very cold process. You fill out an application online, fill in all the blanks, include a resume where all the blanks are answered again, and you submit a cover letter. All of this is time consuming, at times it can take a couple of hours to complete one application. The end result a two sentence e-mail stating they have other candidates they think would be better.
So, what happens when you get that call, that inquiry from an application submitted. They want you, you have the qualifications and more for the position, they almost beg you to join their team but.... the big but... it is part-time, no benefits, a four month commitment upfront, and a huge cut in pay... but, they keep reminding you it is your passion.
On the one hand it is a job, on the other hand it really isn't a career. On the one hand they want a successful business in order to make money and you can do it for them, on the other hand you do the work and they get the income. This is where friends begin to separate. Some say it is a job take it, you will have something to do until something better comes along. Others say are you crazy! You can take the job and if they don't listen to you when you say you are going to continue to look it is their fault.
What does the Universe say? The answer will come later of course! Each decision has consequences. Some consequences are positive, some income where there is none. Some consequences are negative, what happens if the day before you start you get offered a great position, then what? Lately the Universe has been watching a comedy when it comes to my life. The Universe probably has a different scenario in mind completely. The unknown to me scenario. A hint would be nice, a message showing or guiding me would be even better since I don't have a crystal ball.
The bottom line is I have to make a decision and live with it. Do I think of my career and what I need to be looking for and where I need or want to be going or do I think of an income and being able to help students? Tough decision but I think it comes down to faith.
Why faith? Do I have faith in myself and the Universe to guide me to a new career when it is time? Do I have faith in me and the Universe that a position as good as or better will arrive just in time? Do I have faith that I will be taken care of? A lot of faith.... I believe in the Universe and I believe everything will work out the way it is supposed to but I don't know what supposed to is right now. We don't usually know but usually there are a lot of clues, a lot of insights and messages to help us but right now I don't have any of this.
Presently I have an ego that thinks if I don't make a decision about taking the position I will be living on the street poor and how will I take care of the adopted puppy I promised to take care of? She was out on the street roaming and now she has a loving home. Will she think I tricked her or she isn't loved anymore or will she be in the same position again and then what? Also, how will I take care of my other dog? I took care of the cats well until they crossed over, how can I not do the same for him. I know he should have a few more years but his age is beginning to show. Do I really think I will be living on the street? NO, but I know of people who have struggled to when jobs were lost or family issues came in the way.
While we are on the topic, feeling abundance and prosperity is difficult when I feel a loss from what I had. Deep down there is a feeling of everything is ok, abundance flows to me easily and effortlessly and the statement so many of my family and friends tell me, Deb, you have been here before and always figure it out.
Is figuring it out taking this position or not taking this position. In my heart of hearts I know I will be ok, I know there is something grand for me, abundance will flow to me easily and effortlessly, and that all is well. No matter what the decision is I need to make it from a place of love not a place of fear. I know decisions made from a place of love always provide the perfect answer or direction. I also know that only I can make the decision and whatever decision I make it is perfect for me and that is all that matters.
I wish I could be calm, live in love and stop fear from entering my body, mind and soul but the ego has a means of making sure it shows up. It doesn't matter how big our ego is we each have an ego that tries to make our life decisions, well any decision. This time and hopefully many times to follow I will make a decision based on love and not fear, on what is best for my soul and not my ego. Will the decision process be easier, probably not but at least I will know I took time to figure out where the decision is coming from and that will hopefully offer me peace.
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